Not the touch-yourself kind...tsk tsk...dirty minds...or perhaps that's me...nothing wrong with 'that kind' of self-love time out.
Today it's more about self compassion, and it’s something you can do anytime during the day or at night when you need a little self luuurrv.
So to practice this exercise, we actually need to call up a little suffering. Ugh! Why on earth do I want to do that?
Well because the art of self compassion requires feeling, accepting and then surrendering to what is.
So I’d invite you to think about a situation in your life right now that is difficult for you.
Maybe you’re feeling stressed or you’re having a relationship problem or you’re worried about something that might happen.
I’d invite you to think of something that is difficult but not overwhelmingly difficult, especially if you’re new to practicing the self luuuurv time out.
So finding a situation and getting in touch with it, what’s going on, what happened or what might happen, who said what, really bring the situation to life in your mind’s eye.
And then I’m going to be writing a series of phrases that are designed to help us remember the three components of self luuuurrv when we need it most.
So the first phrase is - this is a moment of suffering, right?
We’re bringing mindful awareness to the fact that suffering is present, and I’d invite you to find some language that speaks to you, something like, this feels really hard right now or I’m experiencing struggle.
We’re actually turning toward our difficulty, acknowledging it, naming it. This is a moment of suffering.
The second phrase is challenges are a part of life.
We’re reminding ourselves of our common humanity. Challenges are a part of the life cycle. And again, finding language that speaks to you, it may be something like it’s not abnormal to feel this way. Many people are going through similar situations. Right?
The degree of suffering may be different, the flavour of suffering may be different, but going through challenges is a part of life, part of being human. That's what's so beautiful about the human experience. Whatever challenges we are experiencing, know that, somewhere, someone else, has experienced the same challenge and overcome them.
And then the third phrase is I will be kind to myself in this moment.
To support bringing kindness to yourself, I’d invite you to put your hands on your heart or some other place on your body that feels soothing and comforting, feeling the warmth of your hands, the gentle touch, letting those feelings of care stream through your fingers. I will be
And using any language that supports that sense of kindness (and self luuurrrv), perhaps language you would use with a good friend you cared about who was going through a very similar situation.
It may be something like I’m here for you. It’s going to be okay. I care about you. You can even try using a diminutive if that feels comfortable. Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry. Or you can try calling yourself by your first name, anything that feels natural to express your deep wish that you be well, joyful, and free from this particular challenge.
Then slowly bring your awareness back to the room.
Notice how your body feels right now, allowing any sensations to be just be, an acceptance of what is, and allowing yourself to surrender to luuuurrvvv.
Remember to time out often x